The Wheel of Consent®
The Wheel of Consent is a model of consent based on, but not requiring, exchanges of touch. The Wheel notes the distinction between the ‘doing’ aspect of the touch dynamic — who is doing — and the ‘gift’ aspect — who it is for.
For example, you may be touching another person for their enjoyment, or you may be touching them for your own enjoyment. Both of those dynamics are welcome and needed in different situations, and once the distinction is clear, the entire touch dynamic becomes clear, which brings ease, confidence, self-responsibility and freedom to the interaction.
When the dynamics are clear, it becomes apparent how they apply to both touch and non-touch dynamics. Indeed, the application to non-touch dynamics may be of greater import.
You can learn about the Wheel by watching free videos on this website, reading through the Blog, or other options. You can also attend a workshop - online and in some locations in person. Many of our Certified Facilitators also accept individual coaching and consultations.
The Wheel of Consent was developed by Dr. Betty Martin, a retired chiropractor who later worked as a sexuality coach and certified surrogate partner. At a workshop she had learned The Three-Minute Game, developed by Harry Faddis. In her experience of the game with hundreds of hands-on clients, she noticed four distinct dynamics, each one a combination of two factors - who is doing and who it's for. The Wheel of Consent is a diagram of these two factors and four dynamics.
Dr. Martin co-founded the School of Consent in 2018, along with Matt Schwenteck and Robyn Dalzen. Along with Robyn, she trains and teaches about the Wheel of Consent, mainly to other hands-on practitioners.